Thirty, flirty and thriving
by Saraklaine
Summary: On his 13th birthday Kurt Hummel makes a wish. Thirthy, flirthy and thriving. When he wakes up next morning to find out his wish came true, he might realise he got more than he bargained for. Sweet dreams are made of this. Or are they? 13 going on 30 Klaine.
1. Chapter 1

Kurt Humel was anything but ordinary.

Yes, he was just another 13 year old boy with too much baby fat for his age. And he was high pitched enough to stand out no matter how much he hoped his voice will change. He also understood the importance of proper clothes matching more than any other boy. You just don't mix navy blue and lemon yellow.

Kurt also knew one more way he was diferent than other boys. While his classmates were asking their parents to drive them to the mall for their first silly dates, Kur never found a single girl interesting enough to ask her to go to the mall with him. Yeah, he liked Mercedes cause she was loud and she stood up for him when other kids teased him but he didn't want to hold hands with her. He watched enough romantic movies to know that's not the way "love" is supposed to feel.

In fact, only person he could imagine holding his hand was that tall guy from 5th grade. Finn. He had nice hair. He smelled a bit weird but he never pushed Kurt around like other older boys did.

Since his mom died five years ago, Kurt and his dad were on their own. It was hard at first, with his dad trying too hard and Kurt just crying all the time cause he missed his mummy so much sometimes he felt like he might die from that invsible hand that was squeezing his heart inside his chest.

But time goes by and they moved in baby steps. They learn to adapt to life without Elizabeth. It still hurt, everyday, but they learned to enjoy small joys in life. It helped that a year after Elizabeth died he met a boy named Blaine. Blaine's dad came to the shop and Burt fixed his car while Kurt and Blaine talked. Well, Blaine talked and for the first time in a year, Kurt felt like he can smile again. Blaine had a silly mop of hair on top of his head, hezel eyes that were too big for his head and he was so short that he called himself hobbit. Kurt liked him cause he could laugh at himself. People usually just laughed at Kurt. Kurt found out that Blaine's parents moved just few streets away from him and that's how they became friends.

Things got even better after that. Now at least he had one boy friend at school.

School was hard.

All Kurt wanted was to fit in, to be part of the group that sat together at lunch or go to Mike's pool for the weekends or maybe spend some time at theatre group that Quinn's mom was part of. He wanted to be one of the popular kids. He know he would fit in if they just gave him a chance.

But that's the probelm, none of them paid any atention to him.

So he spend most of his time with Blaine. Blaine was a great friend. He listened to Kurt when he was sad, they did their homework together and Blaine never made fun of Kurt's love for fashion. He would even sit with Kurt on the floor of his basement bedroom and flip trough old and new issues of fashion magazines, while Kurt ranted how one day he will work for one of those magazines and whole world will know his name.

It was an afternoon like that when Burt came down the stairs.

"Hey kid, am I interrupting?" he smiled fondly at his 13 year old son.

"No, I was just reading this article. Dad, what's it like to be 30? Kurt asked.

"Wow, where did that came from?" man smiled down at him, and took the offred magazine to find a title "Thirdy, flirty and thriving" on top of one of the pages.

"Aren't you a bit too young to be flirty Kurt?" he teased and Kurt blushed. "Dad, I'm serious. I can't wait till I'm 30"

"Oh kid, trust me, there's nothing special about beeing thirty." Burt sid with a sigh, "but there is something super special about beeing 13" he patted his son's back fondly. "And I wanted to know what you wanted to do for your birthday this Saturday"

Kurt just muttered:"I don't want to do anything"

Burt sighed sadly and sat on the bed. He patted the place next to him and Kurt obedientely sat next to him. "Ok, I know these past few years weren't easy on us Kurt. With your mom dying and me working too much and I know how lonely you are." he raised his hand to stop Kurt from talking, "yes, I know, you have Blaine and thats' great but even Blaine has other friends kid" he reprimed. "And we promised each other that we will do our best. We owe it to each other. Hell, we owe it to your mom. I'm sure she would be really sad if she knew her baby boy is spending his 13th birthday moping around the house"

Kurt couldn't argue with that.

"So, how about we go to the mall today, we get you all set up and then this Saturday you invide kids from your class to come here and you can have cake and dance to that weird music of yours I don't understand" Burt sugested with a smile.

His father was trying so hard. He couldn't say no, not when his dad was doing everything he could to make Kurt open up and live a little. And he was right, maybe this could work.

After all, hwo bad can it get?

No, no, no, this is all wrong, Kurt tought as he rocked himself back and forth in his closet. He sobbed into his hands, wanting more than anything for the banging on the other side to stop.

"Please Kurt, open the door" Blaine' spleading voice came from the other side.

"Go away!" he screamed or at least tried, but his tear strained voice was nothing but a whisper.

"Please Kurt, talk to me. They're just jerks, please, don't lsiten to them, open the door Kurt, please" Blaine tried again.

But Kurt just kept crying.

Hid birthday was a complete disaster. He should have known better when all the popular kids actually agreed to come to his house. Oh, they came all right. But just to make fun of him before they knocked down his stash of magazines and left. Thats' when Blaine came in, carying his present, to find brokenhearted Kurt.

Blaine put so much work into his present. Doolhouse but not just an ordinary doolhouse.

Special, cause Kurt was special, too.

He made all the pupets look like models so Kurt could make clothes for them and practice for the day he will be a big designer. Blaine even sprinkled that silly magical dust on the roof, hoping Kurt will notice and find it funny. Maybe make a wish.

But Kurt didn't liked the present. He just grabed the doolhouse, stormed into the closet , pushed it on the shelf over his head and closed the door. Blaine was trying to get him to open the door for 10 minutes now, pleading him on the verge of tears.

"I hate you, go away! I don't want you here!" Kurt yelled again and this time Blaine's tears actually stained his cheeks.

"O-ok" he whispered and walked up the stairs, picking his keyboard along the way. He even wrote Kurt a song. Kurt loved when Blaine played and Blaine tought he could surprise him.

But, as it turns out...

Kurt continued crying, still rocking back and forth.

"One day I'll fly away,

leave all this to yesterday " he repeated time after time.

"Why can't I be thirty? Why can't I be thirty so I can go away to New York and leave this place. I hate it here. I wanna be thirty.

Thirty, flirty and thriving.

Thirty fliry and thriving.

Thirthy flirty and thriving" he chanted, not noticing that his rocking was shaking the shelves above him making sprinkles from doolhouse Blaine made for him fall on top into his hair. Somewhere in the back of his mind Kurt reaised that he's repeating that one line for quite a while, before sleep took over him.

He was thankful this dreadful day was over.

First thing he noticed when he woke up wat that he was no longer in the closet (bad joke guys, I know, I couldn't stop myself :) ) He was in bed, warm and comfortable. His dad probably found him after Blaine told him what happened. Funny how he doesen't remember walking to the bed.

Huh.

He streched, noticing how sore his mucles are. That should teach me not to sleep on the floor, he tough to himslelf. He slowly got up, still not completely awake and with his eyes half open, tried to steer into the direction of his bathroom. He turned the faucet on and splashed cold water into his face. He rubed his hands over his cheeks, noticing how weird they feel under his fingers.

He lifted his eyes to take a look in the mirror and let out a piercing scream!

That wasn't him.

Some person, some grown up was staring at him from the mirror, eyes wide and cheeks flushed.

He spun around just to make sure no one was standing behind him.

Nope, he was definitely alone. He faced the mirror again and saw the person in the reflection staring at him dumbfounded.

"Oh my God" he mouthed, poking his own face with his index finger, before screaming again.

No, no, this just can't be.

What the hell is going on?

He turned away from the stranger in the mirror and ran out of the bathroom, determined to go upstairs and demand an explination form his dad. Only, when he came out he saw that there is NO upstairs and that he wasn't in his room. He was in a huge, perfectly decorated bedroom that most certainly didn't belong to him. He spun around again and padded down the hall into even more beautiful living room, that again, most definitely wasn't his.

"Oh my God, Ive been kidnaped" he uttered in horror. He was very close to start crying when he spotted frames on the fireplace that was obviously never used.

He picked up one of the frames containing picture of his mom and dad, his mom holding baby Kurt in her lap. He smiled fondly before he picked another one. This one held a slightly older Kurt , smiling with Mercedes, their front teeth missing. Every next frame he picked up contained a picture of slightly older Kurt. Last picture in the row was showing the stranger from the mirror and some very handome man, holding hands one the beach and smiling.

Kurt's brain frooze.

It was him.

Stranger in the mirror? That was him.

He's...He's...He's...

HOT! his brain suplied, looking down at the framed picture. Kurt bolted towards the bathroom again. He stood in front of the full lenght mirror and gasped again.

He was breathtaking.

Baby fat was gone, he was tall and lean and he had a jaw that could cut trough diamons! He looked at the sweatpants and plain balck shirt he was wearing and shook his head.

No way that can be me, he tought as he lifted his shirt above his head, only to notice a toned, flat stomach that made him squeal like a 13 year old.

Hold on, he WAS 13. No, wait, was he?

Person in the mirror most definitely wasn't 13. He was...

Kurt's eyes went wide as he realised.

"I'm 30" he mouthed and stranger did the same in the mirror.

He ws silent for a minute, just staring at the empty space. But then a roaring laugh broke trough and Kurt couldn't stop himself.

"I'm 30! I am freaking thirty and I'm hot! I'm not just hot, I high jacked a body of a freaking overlord or something" he sang songed as he jumped around. "OH" he bit his lip as he stoped what he was doing. He looked around, even though he knew he's alone here ( wherever her was) and pulled on the strings of his sweatpants. He closed his eyes as he pulled the front away so he can look and peaked down.

"Holy hell" he screamed as he quickly covered himself again, blushing furiously as he looked at his double in the mirror. He bit his lip again and took another peak. This time he actually gigled.

"Puberty, take that!" he fist pumped in thrymph, admiring himself.

Not that he'd seen anyone's...Erm, THAT before and he had no one to compare to but from what he read before he knew his 30year old self was quite...Presentable, he smiled at himself.

"I'm thirty" he whipered in awe.

Just then he heard a door opening and he hurried to put his shirt back on and tie the strings to his sweatpants. He tentatively walked out only to be greated by a bright "Good morining love" and a strong embrace. He yelped and the man took one step back. "Are you ok? gorgeous man in front of him, that Kurt recognized as beach boy, asked with worry in his voice.

Kurt eyed him for a moment before steping back. "I'm sorry, who are you?" he asked and the man smiled brightly at him.

"Stop it, you goof. I have to get back to the clinic and you need to get that sexy ass of yours to Vogue, Quinn called 4 times since this moring, said you weren't answering your phone" man said, pulling his shirt above his head and unzipping his pants.

"Oh my God, what are you doing" Kurt squeaked as he covered his eyes with his hands.

"I'm taking a shower" man answered, eyeing Kurt strangely. "Care to join me if you promise you'll behave?" he smiled as he smacked Kurt on the ass lightly, making him jump up.

"I do not want to do that" Kurt said, his voice higher than ever. And put your clothes back on, who ever you are"

Man sighed. "I don't know what game you're playing but I don't have time for this love" he said as he leaned in to brush his lips lightly over Kurt's, making him jump back. "As hot as I find your sudden interest in innocence kink, I have to go baby" he said as he kissed Kurt's cheek and left in the direction of the bathroom, wearing only boxers and making Kurt blush harder that ever before. No wonder 30year old Kurt let this guy kiss him, his ass was amazing. I mean, HE is amazing, Kurt corrected himself.

"Oh and call Quinn, please? If you don't your fiance might just have to throw himself off of a bulding if she keeps buging him. How can you stand her is beyong me" man from earlier spoke and Kurt gapsed.

Fiance?

That gorgeous man in there is his fiance?

How the hell did he scored a man like that?

Plus, a doctor, from what Kurt's brain could figure out.

He needed same answeres, ASAP.

And maybe Quinn ( no way that's the same Quinn his young self knew) will have some answers.


	2. Chapter 2

Ok, he needed a phone.

But what does his phone look like?

Wait, what do phones look like NOW?

They were these huge, black brick like things when he was 13.

Phone...'now where would I keep my phone?' He thought to himself.

"Erm..Fi-Fiancé guy?" he called out.

No one was responding.

He tried a little louder.

"Fiancé guy? Do you know where my phone is?" He asked again.

But as he came closer to the door he realized that the shower was on and the guy wouldn't be able to hear him.

'Ok, my naked fiancé is in the shower', he thought, blushing furiously.

'I am thinking about a naked man who's name I still don't know.'

He looked around and then saw a pair of pants on the floor.

"Oh, maybe his phone is in his pants." he said out loud, bending over to go through the pockets.

He found a tiny silver phone and a leather wallet.

"Oh, a wallet," he beamed at the chance to find out hot guys name.

He opened it and took out the mans drivers license.

"Jeremy Parker" he read aloud, rolling the name on his tongue.

"Jeremy. I like it" he smiled to himself, returning the wallet to the pocket and opening the phone.

"Ok, he said Quinn called him, let me see..." he murmured as his fingers danced over the keys.

He found last caller and dialed.

"Did you hunt him down?!," a female voice came from the other side.

"Erm..Hi," he said tentatively.

"Hummel? Don't you hi me, you're late. I am picking you up in 10 minutes and dragging you into the office. The Boss will have my non-existing balls if his star designer is not at the meeting today!" she said in a hurry.

"Quinn?" he gave it a try.

"Yes, it's Quinn. Are you still drunk? I told you to go home early last night, but no, you just HAD to be the last one out of the club. I bet you feel like dead man walking," she said, the smile evident in her voice.

'I was a the club? Hmm, that explains the soreness', he thought.

"No, I'm fine. Look, there's a naked man in my apartment," he said in a hushed voice.

"He's in the shower and he's really hot!" he said proudly.

"Can you believe it?"

"What?" she hissed.

"You have a man in there? Where's Jer? And why are you calling from his phone if you have another guy in there?! Kurt, I am not in the mood for this crap today!"

"What? What other guy? No, there's this Doctor guy here. Jeremy Parker. I think we're engaged!" Kurt beamed.

"You think? I-what are you talking about, Kurt?! Are you high? Or-Oh my God, you're high, aren't you?!" She groaned.

"Just get your ass outside, I'll be there in 10 minutes," she said before she hung up.

He stared down at the phone, confusion etched into his face before giving up on trying to understand anything.

He walked back into his ( oh god, not just his, HIS AND HIS FIANCE'S bedroom ) to get dressed.

He has a meeting to get to.

He opened a set of large double doors and almost fainted.

It was his closet.

And boy was his closet HUGE!

It was the size of his living room back at his old house.

Pants, shirts, shoes, scarves-oh the magnificent scarves- all lined up against the sides. It was HEAVEN!

"Mind if I get in there?" A voice came from behind him, accompanied by firm hands squeezing his waist lightly, making him yelp again.

"You're a bit nervous this morning" the man-Jeremy- smiled at him as he walked around and came into Kurt's view.

He was wrapped just in a white towel and Kurt's eyes went wide as he blushed, biting his lip.

"Don't do that" Jeremy said, poking him in the chest with a small smile. He walked closer and begun to nuzzle his head into Kurt's neck and this time Kurt didn't flinch back.

"I have a surgery at 11. But I miss you, I really do, " he said kissing Kurt's neck and making him giggle.

"I promise I'm all yours tonight, Kay?" he said, leaning in to kiss Kurt.

Kurt's brain stopped working.

Gorgeous doctor slash fiancé slash guy with the awesome ass is about to kiss him.

His first kiss.

Well...obviously NOT but first that he will know of.

He closed his eyes and leaned in as the man placed his lips upon his.

WOW.

No wonder Kurt wanted to marry this guy. His kisses were amazing!

Sooner than Kurt would have liked the Jeremy guy was pulling back with a small sigh.

"God, I miss you. Okay...now I really have to get dressed!" he squeezed Kurt's waist one more time before he turned and began to remove his towel, paying no mind to the fact he was no further than 5 feet away from Kurt.

Kurt inhaled sharply as he turned on his heel, away from him.

"Oh God, you-you, you're naked!" Kurt stuttered.

He could hear the man chuckling lightly.

"Yeah, that's a new one, you've never seen me naked before," he snorted as Kurt quickly move inside the closet to grab a pair of jeans and a shirt, looking anywhere but the half naked man.

He ran into the bathroom to get dressed, tracing his fingers over his lips.

'This Doctor guy really knows how to kiss', he thought to himself.

He dressed quickly and went to get the blue scarf he noticed the second he opened the doors to that magic place he could called his closet.

Jeremy was dressed too and was picking his scattered clothes from the living room floor.

"Sorry, I will never EVER again leave them on the floor again, please don't withhold your goodies from me," he winked smiling at Kurt.

Kurt bit his lip, eyeing the playful gleam in the other mans eye and simply said : "Kay."

There was a buzz on the door and the other man left to get it.

"Kurt, it's Quinn, she's downstairs. We can leave together now, you wanna lock up?" he asked.

Kurt walked to the door and looked around warily.

"I don't know where the keys are." he said, earning himself another smile from the man in front of him.

"What would you do without me?" he sighed with a fond smile as he gave Kurt another set of keys.

"Come on baby, she's gonna rip you a new one if you keep her waiting!"

They entered the elevator and Kurt used the opportunity to really look at the man that was supposedly his fiancé.

He really was gorgeous.

His hair was dark brown and he had short bangs that were swooped to the side.

He was just as tall as Kurt but his shoulders were broader.

Unlike Kurt he was tanned, and his eyes were chocolate brown.

He had a genuine smile and generally looked more like a sitcom star than a doctor.

He really was extremely attractive.

"Are we really dating?" Kurt let slip, voice full of disbelieve before he could stop himself.

The man just laughed.

"I hope so cause I'd hate to think I'd imagined these past 3 years." he said leaning into Kurt.

"3 years?" Kurt's questioned ,eyes going wide.

Jeremy just eyed him with concern, placing his hand on Kurt's forehead.

"Are you sure you're ok? You're acting really weird, are you sure you're not coming down with something. A fever? A cold or the flu? Maybe a-"

"No, I'm fine!" Kurt interrupted quickly,

"I mean, I'm a little disoriented, that's all." He said, offering him a small smile.

"Yeah, partying all night will do that to you," he scolded fondly.

"You're not 16 anymore you know? Maybe it's time to slow down a little."

"Yeah, you're probably right," Kurt answered and he was rewarded with a wide smile from the other man.

"Okay, I'll be home by 6 and then we're ordering take out,cuddling on the couch and then I'm going to make it up to you for all those night you were alone while I was working!" Jeremy said as he cupped Kurt's face.

"I really am sorry Kurt, the hospital is understaffed and its just been crazy lately!"

"It's ok," Kurt said, even though he really had NO idea what the man was talking about, but he did seem genuinely sorry for whatever it was anyway.

The elevator stopped soon after and they exited to see a grumpy looking Quinn standing next to a limo.

"Good luck,baby." The Doctor whispered in his ear before moving to peck Kurt on the lips.

He couldn't help but smile when Kurt chased after them once he pulled back.

"You're all cute this morning," he smiled again, before kissing him one last time in farewell and walking to his own car.

Kurt looked after him dreamily before Quinn groaned next to him.

"So, you two are in love again or something?" she asked with an eye roll.

Kurt turned to look at her and recognition dawned on him.

"Oh my God, you're Quinn Fabray!"

"Did he screwed you out of your mind last night?" she asked, narrowing her eyes as his cheeks flamed red.

"And now you're blushing? What the fuck are you blushing for?"

Kurt opened his mouth to speak but she cut him off,

"Look, we have to go, they're talking about redesigning the magazine and they need their star designer to give them some fresh ideas," she said before she all but dragged him out of the building and into the limo.

She sat next to him, offering him a cup of coffee which he accepted.

"So, we're friends now?" he asked her, taking a sip of his coffee and making a face.

It was bitter and it tasted weird all together.

'How the hell do grown-ups drink this?'

She rolled her eyes at him.

"I have no idea what you took last night but our asses are on the line here. So get your act together and at least try to listen to Michael at this meeting, okay? If you feel like you can't do anymore, just nod along."

"Ok, I can do that," he said in a determined voice before he turned to look at her.

"And I didn't take anything. I'm 30," he smiled like an idiot into his coffee.

"Whatever sunshine," she said as the car pulled to a stop.

They walked into a tall building and Quinn grabbed his elbow, her gaze softening.

"Look, I know I was bitchy these past few weeks and I'm sorry, but my job is on the line and I'm scared shiftless. I want you to know how much I appreciate everything you did to help me, Kurt.

"I know you had it rough too and that your life is far from perfect, but we need to nail this, okay?"

"Okay," he nodded, not having any idea what he is agreeing to.

He took a deep breath as she led him into a big, crowded office.

"Well, look who decided to join us," a harsh voice came from the front of the large desk.

The voice belonged to a man in his 50's, streaks of silver coloring his templates.

"Now that and his little vixen decide to bless us with their presence we can officially begin. Who's going first?" he asked, looking around the table just as a tall man to his left got up to speak.

Kurt took a deep breath, just as Quinn took his hand.

"Relax." So whispered.

"We've got this" she said to assure him.

It didn't help him or calm his nerves in the slightest.

Somehow he ended up at his dream job-apparently-but he had no idea how he got there, or what to do now that he actually IS there.

The 13 year old Kurt inside the now 30 year old Kurt's body shivered at the thought that he might, single handedly, ruin everything his older self worked so hard for.


	3. Chapter 3

**I totally forgot I put this story on ff :( **

**Sorry.**

**Update, update, I have three more done so I'll update soon, I promise. **

**I own nothing and it hurts, okay? -_-**

* * *

"Well, that went better than I thought." Quinn smiled as they left the meeting. "I had no idea you gave Michael your ideas yesterday. Good job," she squeezed Kurt's arm. "Now, all you have to do is come up with the perfect cover. Since you're using your models and you have to pick your favorites that might take a while," she teased.  
Kurt was just walking next to her.

His ideas were brilliant. Well, his 30-year-old self's ideas were brilliant. His boss was beaming while he explained Kurt's ideas, that he thankfully, gave him yesterday, while he was still his 30-year-old self.

God, that whole "Am I 13 or am I 30" thing was so confusing.

They stepped next to a large office in the corner and tall, Latina girl walked over. "Good morning Mr. Hummel. I have your messages here, do you want me to read them to you?" she asked.  
Kurt turned to look at her and noticed she was wearing huge glasses and looked absolutely petrified to even address him. "Erm… Yeah, sure," he said as she opened the door for him and they walked in.

She cleared her throat. "Miss Valentino called to let you know she managed to get those materials for you after you threatened to strangle her with them if she doesn't," the Latina said.  
"What? How can I strangle her with something I don't have?" he thought out loud.  
"I don't know, sir," she answered simply. "Shall I go on?"  
Kurt was still contemplating the idea of him actually threatening anyone. "Yeah, sure."

"Mr. Clark called and…"she shifted on her feet, "you might want to read this yourself," she muttered.  
He turned around. "What's' your name again?" he asked.  
"Santana, sir," she said with a small sigh.  
"Ok Santana," he offered her a small smile and she almost recoiled from him "Just read, it's ok."  
She cleared her throat. "You stupid jerk, don't you have anything better to do than to fuck around with other people's boyfriends, you worthless piece of sh-" she got interrupted by a loud "Ok, ok, I'll read it myself," he said snatching the papers from her hands.

He looked down at the message scribed and his eyes went wide. "He said all of this to me?" he asked in horror.  
"Um...Yes, sir," Santana answered.  
"But… Why?" he turned to her, asking for answers. "I don't even know this person or his boyfriend, why would he say these things to me?"

Her eyes went wide as if Kurt just grew a third head right in front of her.  
"I have...I have a fiancé, Santana," he smiled and walked over to her, taking her hand in his own, making her snatch her hand back. "He's a doctor," he said as if telling her the greatest secret in the universe.  
"Yes sir, I know," she said, still eyeing him as if he went crazy.  
"Then why is this Clark person yelling at me? Who is he?" he wanted to know.  
"I don't...I don't know, sir," girl answered.

Kurt just groaned. This is all so weird. Yesterday he was 13 year old boy, who's birthday took wrong turn and today he's a 30year old obviously rich designer, at job of his dreams, with a dreamy man to call his fiancé and apparently people who hate him and call him names on the phone.

"I really need some answers," he said to himself.  
"Sorry, sir?" Santana said, asking him to repeat.  
"I know" he turned to her again. " I need to talk to Blaine, can you call him for me? I have no idea where I left my phone," he said.

She stared at him in confusion. "Who's Blaine, sir?"  
"What do you mean Who's Blaine? My best friend Blaine, don't play with me. He will tell me what happened in these 17 years I missed." Kurt said and Santana's mouth fall open. "Don't look at me like that," he said, noticing the way she was eyeing him. "Just do as I said."  
"But sir, I don't have a man named Blaine in your contacts," she said, her voice laced with fear at his words.  
"What do you mean you don't have him? You're my secretary and you don't have my best friends number? You're obviously not very good at what you do" he gave her a stern look and she lowered her head.  
"Sir, you don't have a best friend named Blaine" she dared to say. "Your best friend is Quinn and your closest male friend is your brother Finn. I'm sorry, but I have never heard you speak of this Blaine person, sir"

"My WHAT?" he hissed. "My brother? What are you talking about, I don't have a brother," he informed her as if she was crazy. "Oh my God, this is such a mess," he groaned.

"Ok, you're my secretary, you do stuff for me right? " he asked and she nodded quickly. "Just find me Blaine Devon Anderson. We went to the same school and he used to play piano and he carried a camera around and took a billion pictures of everything. He should be…" Kurt trailed off cause he realized he had no idea what Blaine actually did with his life. "Just, find him, ok?" he gave a harsh order and she gave a short nod and left the room.

This was getting more and more weird by the second.  
How could people who work with him not know Blaine?  
And who the hell is this Finn person that Santana said was his brother?

His eyes went wide as he remembered he knew "A" Finn.  
He stormed out and yanked the doors open to find Santana going through stack of papers.  
"Santana!" he screamed.  
"I'm searching, sir," she yelped.  
"Yeah, that's great. What's my brother's last name? Finn? What's his last name?" he demanded.  
She eyed him, confused, before she tentatively answered "Hudson, sir. Finn Hudson."

Kurt grabbed the door handle to prevent himself from falling over.  
Holy crap!  
Finn Hudson, the boy that smelled weird, was his brother.  
"I...I" he stuttered. "I'm gonna need all the info you have on him, too." he said and Santana, too freaked out to say anything, just nodded.

Kurt returned to his office and sat down. "My dad remarried?" he asked himself out loud.  
He couldn't imagine his father with another woman, other than his mother. But then again, 17 years is a long time to be alone. He groaned as he sank his head into his hands, only to be startled by a loud buzz coming from the phone next to him. Red light was flashing in his face.

"Santana?' he called out. "There's... This weird thing is blinking in my office."  
She walked in and stared at him, staring at the little red light.  
"Sir, that's me calling you. Mr. Roberts is here," she said in a hushed voice.  
"Who's that?" he asked.  
"Um… Your buyer from Paris, sir," she murmured.  
"Oh. Ok, let him in," Kurt waved his hand.

She called out for the man and eyed him in disgust as she closed the door behind him.  
"Hello, Mr. Roberts, what can I do for you today," Kurt tried to sound all business like but was thrown off as the man leaned over and all but stuck his tongue at Kurt's mouth, as his hands grabbed him by the shirt.  
"What the hell are you doing," Kurt jumped up in horror, shaking the man off of himself.  
Other man just winked and rounded Kurt again. "Oh come on sugar, I know you've missed me."

"I beg your pardon?" Kurt hissed at him. "I have no idea who you think you are but you need to keep your paws to yourself."  
"Paws? Oh, is that what we're playing now? Oh, I can play," he smirked, as he climbed on top of the desk and pretended to claw through the air with his hand. "Rrrr" he said with another wink.  
"Oh my God, stop that," Kurt backed away in disgust. He straightened up, fixing his shirt that this Roberts person untucked from his pants. "Get off of my desk, whoever you are," he ordered.  
Man's smile went wide. "I love when you boss me around," he snarled. He jumped from the desk and landed on his knees, reaching out for Kurt's' belt buckle. Kurt almost screamed. "Santana!" he called out loudly.

She came running through the door, stopping dead at her tracks when she saw the scene.  
"Santana, why did you let this man into my office?" he hissed at her.  
"Sir, I..." she had no words.  
"Come on babe, she knows about us, relax," the man, STILL on his knees said, eyeing Kurt like he was a piece of meat.  
"Don't call me babe, I am not your babe." Kurt stared down at the man with icy eyes. "I have a fiancé, for your information." Kurt said proudly, "He calls me that."  
"Oh I know all about Dr. Boring," the man said with a snort.  
"What?" Kurt asked. "He's not boring! He's tall and handsome and he kissed me and he said we're going to cuddle and you're stupid," Kurt truly sounded like a 13 year old. "Get up, you look ridiculous."  
"Well, this is a first." man wasn't giving up. "You never thought I looked ridiculous on my knees before, babe."  
"I said don't call me that. I am engaged to a doctor, Santana, tell him I have a fiancé that's a doctor," Kurt glared at her.

Santana was speechless.  
Whoever the fuck was that in front of her, it wasn't Kurt Hummel.

"Erm...Yes." she said stupidly.  
Paul Roberts was around for a long time and he certainly did a lot more than buy things for Kurt.  
But right now Kurt acted as if he saw the man for the first time and what the hell was all that 'my fiancé is a doctor' all of the sudden?

"Ok, fine, you're not in the mood, I get it," the man said, standing up. He took another step and tried to kiss Kurt again. Not really meaning to push him so hard, Kurt defended himself and the man went flying backwards.

Santana screamed from her place at the door.  
"Don't you dare touch me ever again, do you hear me?" he screamed at the man. At this point there was not so small crowd at his door, eyeing the scene. "Get out!" he screamed again and the man all but ran out of his office.  
"Get in and close that door!" he snarled at Santana, and she obeyed immediately. "Why did you let that man in here?" he demanded.  
"Sir, he's here often, I had no idea you two..." she tried to explain.  
"He attacked me Santana, he grabbed me and he kissed me! What the hell was that all about?" he asked, knowing he's asking the wrong person. "He just thought it's ok to come her and stick his tongue down my throat, oh god, that was disgusting." he made a face and then turned to face Santana. "Jeremy's kisses are a million times better and he smells nice and his ass is prettier!" he said in a tone a petulant child would use. "Don't you let him here ever again, do you hear me?" he asked and Santana nodded.

"I...I found Blaine, sir," she informed him, praying for a change in subject.  
"You did?" Kurt's face lit up.  
"Yes, sir. He lives here in the city, here," she said handing him a piece of paper, " I got you the address."  
"Excellent!" he said. "Can you call me a cab, I'm gonna go talk to him right now."  
"Um, sir, Rory can take you there, the car is outside" she said as if it was obviously he should take his own car and not take a cab.  
"Oh? I have a driver?" he said with a small smile. "Awesome."

"Sir, Jeremy called, asked if you're coming home fro dinner" she darred.

"Oh" he remembered. Fiance guy. Maybe he can coax some answers there and THEN go talk to Blaine.

"Yes, tell him I'm on my way" he smilled happily.

He took the paper, patting Santana on the shoulder and offering her a smile as he left, making her eyes go impossibly wide.

She stood there, not quite sure what just happened.  
Her icy cold boss, the bitchiest bitch on Upper East Side just kicked his boy toy out of his office, patted her on the shoulder and proclaimed his doctor fiancé kissed better than said boy toy.

Hell just froze over.

* * *

**Ok, what do you think? *le cheesy grin***


End file.
